Conflict and disagreement are distinct from one another, even though they often seem related. A disagreement is when two or more parties have differing opinions or perspectives on an issue but maintain a respectful relationship.
In a disagreement, dialogue remains open, and individuals might leave the discussion either with a stronger belief in their original stance or with new insights that could lead to a reevaluation of their position.
In such cases, the relationship may even be strengthened through the exchange of ideas.
Conversely, conflict arises when a disagreement leads to a breakdown in communication, creating tension between the involved parties. Relationships become strained, and dialogue may cease altogether. The Danish Centre for Conflict Resolution simplifies this by defining conflicts as “disagreements that lead to tension within and between people.”
This definition reflects the dual nature of conflicts, which involve both an issue (the disagreement itself) and a relational component (the resulting tension between individuals).
Table of contents
Definition of Conflict
Conflict emerges when two or more interdependent parties experience strong emotions and perceive their outcomes or beliefs as incompatible.
This often leads to negative emotions and behaviours aimed at prevailing over the other party. It’s essential to recognize that conflict is not inherently harmful. While it can lead to destruction, it also presents opportunities for growth, increased effectiveness, and improved relationships.
Nature
It often involves two core elements: the issue (the subject of the disagreement) and the relationship (the connection between the people involved). While the issue at hand is usually concrete and easier to identify, the relational aspect can be more complex, involving unspoken boundaries and expectations.
People have different levels of permission to comment on or influence various areas of our lives, and these boundaries can shift depending on our mood or circumstances.
For instance, on some days, we may feel open to criticism or advice from others, while on other days, we might interpret the same comments as hostile. The dynamic between issue and relationship is crucial for understanding conflicts. Addressing only the issue without considering the relationship may lead to temporary solutions, but the underlying tension may persist.
Escalation of Conflicts
When conflicts are left unchecked, they often escalate. This escalation occurs in a predictable pattern, where the original issue becomes blurred, and the relationship deteriorates. The conflict escalates from a simple disagreement into a personal attack, leading to increased hostility and, in some cases, outright aggression.
The Danish Centre for Conflict Resolution outlines a series of stages that conflicts typically go through, with specific turning points marking critical moments in the conflict’s progression:
- Disagreement: At this stage, the parties involved are still focused on the issue and trying to resolve it.
- Personification: The focus shifts from the issue to personal blame, with each party seeing the other as the problem.
- The Problem Expands: Past issues and grievances are brought into the conflict, further complicating the matter.
- Dialogue Stops: Communication breaks down, and parties start seeking allies, leading to gossip and negative assumptions.
- Enemy Images: The opposing party is viewed as the enemy, with little to no redeeming qualities.
- Open Hostility: Tensions escalate into psychological or even physical aggression.
- Polarization: The conflict reaches a point where coexistence seems impossible, and the parties become entirely divided.
Importance of Communication
A key turning point in its escalation is the stopping of dialogue. Once communication ceases, resolution becomes exceedingly difficult. Without open lines of communication, both parties rely on their assumptions. These assumptions and grievances fuel the conflict further.
The breakdown of communication is often where conflicts become the most dangerous, as misunderstandings, selective hearing, and misinterpretations become prevalent.
Maintaining dialogue, even when tensions are high, is essential for conflict resolution. Taking a break or “time-out” may be necessary to allow emotions to settle, but this break must be temporary. Complete silence or avoidance can lead to entrenched enemy images and open hostility.
Role of Perception and Emotion
As it escalate, negative emotions such as fear, anger, and frustration begin to cloud rational thought. Communication becomes distorted, and individuals may start doubting the intentions of the other party.
In this phase, people often become more entrenched in their positions, and it becomes harder to separate the issue from the person. What started as a disagreement over a tangible issue transforms into a personal attack, further fueling it.
Dehumanization and Open Hostility
In extreme cases, dehumanization can occur, where one party begins to see the other as less than human, viewing them as inherently evil or unworthy of compassion. This often leads to open hostility, including physical or psychological violence. The belief that “the ends justify the means” becomes prevalent. People view moderate voices or external interventions as naive or untrustworthy.
Once a conflict reaches this stage, it is challenging to resolve without external intervention. The hostility can escalate into severe violence, such as seen in genocides or large-scale atrocities, where dehumanization is a common precursor.
Five Dimensions of Conflict
You can analyze it through different dimensions. Each dimension represents various aspects of human needs and motivations. Most of the time, it does not stay confined to a single dimension. Instead, they span multiple areas. When you understand the dimension a conflict is rooted in, you can address it more effectively.
- Structural Dimension: This dimension relates to the external framework or systems under which people operate. It includes laws, organizational structures, and societal norms. In this dimension often require changes in policy or influence on decision-makers to resolve.
- Instrumental Dimension: In this dimension, it is practical. They often deal with how to achieve specific tasks or goals. These conflicts are more straightforward. Problem-solving and negotiations can resolve them, as they revolve around procedural disagreements.
- Dimension of Interest: This dimension deals with resources, such as money, time, or space. Negotiation and compromise are essential for resolving conflicts in this dimension since both parties are often vying for the same limited resources.
- Dimension of Value: Value conflicts arise from deeply held beliefs and ideologies, including religion, morality, or political views. These are more challenging to resolve because values are often non-negotiable. Dialogue and understanding are crucial for managing value-based conflicts, as the goal is not to change someone’s values but to reach mutual respect and tolerance.
- Personal Dimension: This dimension roots in personal identity, self-esteem, and loyalty. Conflicts in this area often become the most emotionally charged. They touch on fundamental aspects of an individual’s sense of self-worth. Resolving personal conflicts requires empathy, active listening, and a focus on rebuilding trust.
Conflict Resolution Strategies
Effectiveb resolution requires addressing both the issue at hand and the relationship between the conflicting parties. Various strategies can be employed depending on the nature and escalation level:
- Dialogue and Communication: Keeping communication open is vital in all stages of conflict. When dialogue stops, conflict escalates rapidly, making resolution more difficult. Active listening, non-violent communication, and appreciative inquiry can help in fostering a constructive dialogue.
- Mediation: When parties are too entrenched to resolve the conflict on their own, they may bring in a neutral third party to mediate. Mediators facilitate communication and ensure both sides are heard. They guide the parties toward finding a mutually acceptable solution.
- Negotiation: When it revolves around resources or interests, negotiation is a common method of resolution. Both parties need to be willing to compromise to reach a solution that meets the needs of both sides.
- Restorative Practices: Drawing on examples like the Blackfoot Indians’ conflict resolution ceremonies, restorative practices involve bringing together all parties affected by a conflict to foster understanding and healing. By focusing on shared values and communal well-being, these practices can help de-escalate conflicts and restore relationships.
- Emotional Intelligence and Self-Awareness: Developing emotional intelligence and self-awareness can help individuals navigate conflicts more effectively. Recognizing and managing one’s emotions during a conflict can prevent escalation and promote constructive dialogue.
Final Words
Conflict is an inevitable part of human interaction. How people manage it determines its impact on relationships and communities.
Understanding the nature, recognizing the signs of escalation, and employing appropriate conflict resolution strategies can prevent disagreements from spiraling into damaging conflicts.
By addressing both the issue and the relationship, fostering open communication, and seeking mutual understanding, conflicts can become opportunities for growth and stronger connections rather than sources of division and hostility.
